Unitarians teaching sex-ed to old people

An article on Oprah.com (fuck you I don't need to justify why I was on that website) detailed a sex-ed class for adults provided by Unitarians. The ideal demographic was supposed to be young adults in their 20s and 30s but apparently a lot more “older” people showed up to talk about, among other things, “what normal genitals look like”. I’m sorry I gave you that mental image. The mental image of old people and sex, mind you, not of normal genitals. I give up. Take it away block quote

Then Detwiler pulled out a model of a penis and the "Wondrous Vulva Puppet."[Ed.Note: I use my “wondrous vulva puppet” to entertain small children at school bus stops]. She had labels ready (clitoris, perineum, vagina, glans, PC muscle) and asked volunteers to place them correctly. As students moved through the lesson, they talked about how the different parts contribute to pleasure.Next, the instructors asked the students to compare the Masters and Johnson linear model of sexual response[Ed. Teehee "Masters and Johnson" ] -- excitement, plateau, orgasm, and resolution -- to a circular model of mutual pleasure. To explain the idea, Detwiler drew a large circle on newsprint and asked students to think of all sorts of sexy, fun activities and list them around the circle. The students came up with "caress, oral sex, kiss, massage, lubrication, talking[Ed.Note: Hmmm I wonder if an older woman suggested that], fondling, phone sex, kiss again, snuggle." In a circular model, Detwiler pointed out, partners can start or stop sensual activity anytime they want[Ed.Note: depends on your partner], and the activities don't necessarily lead to orgasm[Ed. Note: too easy].Sylvie says that some students thought that type of sex would be an exercise in frustration, but others said they could imagine times in their lives when those options would work -- when they were not ready to have sex with a new partner, when they were too tired to have intercourse with their current partner, when they were trying to liven things up with a longtime lover. [Source: oprah.com]

True story: I took my mom to see Knocked Up at her urging and at the point in the film at which Seth Rogan is describing what he would expect on a second date, my sixty-something mother turned to me and asked “What’s a ‘BJ’?”. Worst. Movie Experience. Ever. Trauma aside, in the end I’m fairly happy she doesn’t know the answer to that and I don’t want crazy Unitarians telling her or any old people. Your sexual days are over. Learn to knit.